Pride is a common human emotion that can be both positive and negative. It’s important to understand the different aspects of pride so you can learn to manage them in your life.

It’s no secret that feelings of pride play a big role in our lives. We often feel proud of our accomplishments and this can be a positive force that motivates us to further success. However, there is also such a thing as negative/unhealthy pride, which can lead to destructive behaviors. 

In this blog post, we’ll explore the different kinds of pride and discuss how to unlock the positive potential while minimizing the negative effects of pride. Stay tuned.

Is pride an attitude?

Yes, pride is an attitude. It is also defined as a  feeling or emotion.

What does it mean to have pride?

Having pride is an interesting phenomenon. Some would say it’s the same as bragging, but pride is so much more than that. 

The dictionary describes pride as a feeling or deep pleasure or satisfaction from your own achievements, the achievements of those with whom you closely associate, or from qualities or possessions that you widely admire.

That doesn’t sound so bad, does it?

Well for starters, there are different kinds of pride – both healthy and unhealthy (and I’m sure someone will argue that all forms are unhealthy, but that’s not entirely true).

"THE PRIDE also hears how you use your words to relate to others around you and how you speak about situations and people." - Sundae Witkowski

What are the types of pride?

There are two types of pride:

• healthy, positive or authentic pride
• unhealthy, negative or hubristic pride

Healthy or authentic pride

Healthy pride occurs when you’re deeply satisfied in yourself and your accomplishments.

It is the kind of pride you have in being your best – which is easy to confuse with conceit.

Healthy pride also includes the kind of pride you feel when admiring another person (this could lead to confidence, appreciation and even admiration).

Notably, having pride in one’s skills, accomplishments, and abilities is not healthy is necessary for personal and professional growth.

However, this is not the same as pathological narcissism or narcissistic personality disorder where a person overestimates their abilities and has an unreasonable sense of superiority.

Read also: 36 Personality traits of highly successful people

Unhealthy or hubristic pride

Unhealthy pride is when you feel very arrogant, have a huge ego and think that you are better than others.

Many persons with unhealthy pride may even value themselves based on external factors such as wealth, looks, and so on.

The difference between healthy and unhealthy pride?

It can be very difficult to differentiate positive from negative pride.

According to research, the types of pride have different characteristics relating to:

• the regulation of goals
• self-control
• affective tendencies

So, if you’re wondering how to differentiate positive pride from negative pride consider this:

Positive pride associates with self-control, goal engagement, and achievement. On the other hand, negative pride is associates with social dominance and public recognition (Carver & Johnson, 2010).

In fact, when pride is healthy the individual has a strong sense of confidence and high self-esteem which makes them work hard to better themselves while still being kind to others.

Actually, that self-confidence can help motivate people who are struggling to get up in the morning or accomplish even basic tasks.

On the other hand, unhealthy pride makes your self-centered and uninterested in others.

Another main difference between the two types of pride relates to how much you value other people.

For instance, in healthy pride, one acknowledges the contributions of others to your success and accomplishments.

Conversely, in unhealthy pride, one feels overly independent and does not acknowledge the help of others.

Actually, many people struggle each day with both types of pride. The thing about pride is that it can often be hard to recognize.

It can be all around us and sometimes people don’t even realize which type of pride is dominating. 

Now, let’s discuss discuss the causes of unhealthy pride.

"The pride in who we are is not a part of our past, it defines our present and our future." - Queen Elizabeth II

What causes unhealthy pride?

Unhealthy pride is motivated by an intense desire for perfection or status. This kind of pride can lead to various psychological and physical problems. 

And, these issues are ‘self-inflicted’ from putting too much pressure on oneself to achieve one’s goals no matter the cost.

List of causes of unhealthy pride

• The need to create the illusion of superiority
• Being unable to self-reflect
• Excessive competitiveness
• Selfishness – Doing things for yourself without considering how it affects other people around you.

What are the signs of unhealthy pride?

Some signs of unhealthy pride are easily recognized while some can be very subtle. While sometimes you may not notice them but eventually they will become more noticeable.

The signs of unhealthy pride include:

• Desire for attention, recognition, or fame.
• An emphasis on one’s individual or group identity rather than on the values of the larger society.
• Being focused on personal gain and materialism
• Having an excessive desire to amass wealth, power, and prestige.
• A need for higher status or superiority over other people
• Having a toxic preoccupation with one’s personal advancement or image in the world.
• An attitude that sees other people as tools to be exploited and manipulated for personal gain
• Exploitative behavior towards others
• An excessive desire to control other people and to be seen as superior.
• Having a lack of interest in the accomplishments or lives of other people.
• A lack of empathy, due to perceiving oneself as superior which leads to an indifference to the feelings and problems of others.
• Haughty body language – raising the chin, tilting the head back, looking down on others with disdain or feeling superior to them – is an example of haughty body language that may be associated with an unhealthy pride.

• A tendency to exaggerate or embellish one’s achievements.
• Taking credit for the work of others.
• Dishonesty in some forms, such as being two-faced – having one face which you show to your superiors and another when you are less concerned about what people think of you.
• A constant feeling that everyone is envious of you or is trying to bring you down.
• An unwillingness to acknowledge weaknesses or be wrong about anything.
• A belief that you are always right, and that your opinions and values are the only correct ones.
• An unwillingness to consider other people’s viewpoints, try new things or adapt to different circumstances.
• A tendency towards aggression in response to perceived threats or insults.

If you recognize any of these signs in yourself, it may be a good time to reevaluate yourself.

In a lot of ways, unhealthy pride can be very similar to narcissism. Actually, this comes out in a number of different ways.

For example, people who have a lot of unhealthy pride often have an unreasonable sense of superiority or even entitlement which makes them expect things without having to work for them.

Another common trait of unhealthy pride is the tendency to hide one’s faults and mistakes, often by bragging or by creating excuses.

What negative things can come from unhealthy pride?

The negative effects of unhealthy pride can be devastating to one’s health and well-being.

In fact, this kind of pride prevents people from fulfilling their full potential and making a positive impact on others.

Actually, people who suffer from unhealthy pride often put too much pressure on themselves to gain status, money, or fame which in turn affects their health.

Additionally, unhealthy pride makes it harder for you to accept criticism.

Unfortunately, unhealthy pride can also affect your relationships with other people.

People who suffer from unhealthy pride often experience a lot of stress and self-loathing because they are unable to come to terms with their faults or shortcomings.

This can cause problems in your family, business or marriage.

"Know where is your pride coming from. Feel proud of yourself from your authentic self, not from your egoic mind." ~ Roxana Jones

How can I avoid unhealthy pride?

Even though unhealthy pride may seem natural, these tips can help you control this toxic habit:

• Firstly, learn to get out of your own head and to see your imperfection.
• Appreciate the contributions that others make towards your success.
• Be humbled by your success.
• Concentrate on your purpose and not your recognition.
• Keep focusing on the unknown and  the things that you have not yet achieved, because these are the things that will keep you going.
• Try to keep your mind open and focus on what really matters. 
• Ground yourself in reality instead of letting your mind get carried away by fantasies about status or recognition. People should remember you for who you were rather than a memory of what you might have become.
• Make sure to give others the chance to shine and help you.
• Practice empathy—try putting yourself in other people’s place before reacting negatively to their actions. Remember that every person is just another human being who feels pain, gets hurt or simply wants happiness just like you do.
• Admit your mistakes and failures so you can grow from them.
• Don’t beat yourself up over things that are out of your control. It is unhealthy to constantly worry about how others perceive you—try thinking positively instead because this will also affect the way others think about you.
• If you feel that a loved one is becoming too prideful, try to talk to them about it and let them know how you feel.
• Don’t be afraid to ask for help when the situation calls for it. No one knows everything—but everyone knows something.
• Finally, keep your self-esteem as healthy as possible by surrounding yourself with virtuous people who have the qualities that your would want to emulate.

Read also: Why are habits more important than inspiration.

Final words on healthy

Educating yourself on the different kinds of pride can help you better understand your own and others’ actions.

Share what you learned about positive and negative types of pride in this blog post with friends to start a conversation.

It’s important that we all know how our emotions work to be able to relate to one another more effectively.

So let’s get started! What kind of pride do you think is stronger? Positive or Negative? Let me know in the comments below.

Related topics

How to break toxic habits?

Are you struggling to break a toxic habit? Whether it’s smoking, eating junk food, or overspending, these habits can be difficult to overcome.

But, with a little bit of determination and planning, you can break those bad habits for good. Here are some tips to help you get started. Read more

Why is it important to understand the stages of behavioral change?

To make lasting changes in your life, it’s important to understand the stages of behavioral change.

Many people try to make changes before they’re ready, which can lead to frustration and setbacks. 

If you understand the different stages of change, you can work on making progress at your own pace and be more successful in achieving your goals. 

Learn how to unlock behavioral change with the transtheoretical approach

References

Carver, C. S., & Johnson, S. L. (2010). Authentic and Hubristic Pride: Differential Relations to Aspects of Goal Regulation, Affect, and Self-Control. Journal of research in personality, 44(6), 698–703.