SCREEN TIME FOR KIDS: 8 Tips To Win Full Control

A reality too significant to ignore, so let’s understand the debate and learn practical solutions to ensure best practice.

It is the 21 st century and a new day for technology has dawned upon us, where kids use computers and mobile phones at young ages. Controlling screen-time for kids is an increasingly controversial topic that we continually debate. In fact, for many parents it associates with some degree of guilt.

If you’re still confused about limiting screen-time for your kids, you’re in luck. Read on, because in this post you’ll discover:

  • The recommendations and reality.
  • The controversy surrounding limiting screen-time.
  • Nifty solutions to help you control your child’s screen time and find a healthy balance.

Let’s get right to it.

What are the screen time recommendations?

According to the American Academy of Child & Adolescent Health (2020), kids below 18 months of age should have no screen time. 

However, don’t be too worried because this does exclude video chatting, which experts consider beneficial for establishing family ties.

The recommendation is a limit of one hour on weekdays and three hours on weekends for children between the ages of two and six years old. 

Preferably this screen time should be strictly educational. Although the guideline is not as specific, kids six years and older should also have limited activities that include screens.

Notably, you should exclude screen-media during outings, meals or within the hour of bedtime. Parents should also view together with their children to increase the educational value (American Academy of Child & Adolescent Health, 2020).

It is also recommended to follow the 20-20-20 rule to avoid digital eye strain. That is, for every 20 minutes, take a 20 second break and look at something that is at least 20 feet away.

If you’re like me, you’re probably wondering about how many DAYS – and WAYS – you have defied those guidelines.

However, take a little comfort in the fact that you’re not alone. Read on to find out what’s the reality for many families.

Screen time for kids: the limits and effects
"What's society going to be like when the kids today are phenomenally good at text messaging and spend a huge amount of on screen time, but have never gone bowling together."-Clifford Stoll

What’s actually happening with screen time?

According to Schmidt et al. (2012), children from the USA have approximately seven hours screen time per day.

On average, those between the ages of eight to 12 years spend between four and six hours. 

Even more alarming is that teenagers may spend as much as nine hours daily on their phones or computers (American Academy of Child & Adolescent Health, 2020).

Research shows particularly higher rates in children from ethnic minorities or lower socioeconomic households (Schmidt et al., 2012).

I do wonder how many persons comply with these guidelines. Honestly, I know so many individuals who don’t.

Regardless, most of the parents that I know actually do have a strong desire to decrease their children’s screen-time.

On the other hand, there are some parents who believe that there’s no need for generalized guidelines. Let’s review their arguments below.

Here’s the Revolutionary “Executive Skills” Approach to boost your child’s ability in 10 key areas and help them reach their full potential. 

Why some parents choose to control their kid’s screen time

I’m sure you’d all agree that screen time increases the risk of exposure to violent, sexual, misleading, negative content and cyberbullying. 

However, extended screen-time is also positively linked to sleeping, mood including tantrums, aggression and anxiety, and self-image challenges (American Academy of Child & Adolescent Health, 2020).

The situation frequently worsens since prolonged screen media utilization in preschoolers often leads to an even greater use throughout childhood and adolescence (Schimdt et al., 2012).

Screen time guidelines and parental control for children.
"We're raising a generation of children who are uncomfortable with building relationships directly and  prefer to have a screen between them and the world."-  

Children who did not comply with the screen-time and physical activity guidelines had a three to four times higher likelihood of being overweight when compared to those who did (Laurson et al., 2008).

That’s perhaps because the time spent on screens results in children reading fewer books and engaging in less physical activity. 

This practice inevitably causes weight gain, and/or lower academic performances and social interaction. 

The exposure to ads can also influence eating habits. In addition, screens may irritate their eyes and cause headaches.

Why some parents do not control their kid’s screen time

Many persons believe that some individuals -even health professionals- grossly exaggerate the negative effects of screen-time. 

They argue that this entire issue is just another ‘hype’ that is unsupported by substantial evidence. In fact, many of the adverse effects are due to several other, even more significant factors.

As such, it’s simply too difficult- and even nerve wracking- to attribute these adverse consequences to the screen.

Further, the discussions and controversies surrounding limiting screen media are often plagued with judgement, particularly from the persons who do not have any children or parents who claim to follow the guidelines.

People continually judge parents for numerous reasons and this is just another thing for others to feel ‘righteous’ about. Plus, let’s face it, some parents need the little distraction more than others.

Other parents maintain that you should actively encourage screen-time once boundaries are set. Agreeing on what those boundaries are, however, may vary.

However, they do agree that guidelines should be flexible and account for the different types and purposes of the device.

They believe that there is more value in the child learning to set their own restrictions. Also, in this technologically driven society, if the child doesn’t learn to use the screens now, academic delays will inevitably occur.

These children may also feel as if they are missing out and become envious of the ones that are exposed. In essence, the benefits of the screens far out-weigh the potential risk of limiting it.

Screen time effects on kids and recommendations for parental control
"you can't upload love, you can't download time, you can't google all of life's answers. You must actually live some of your life."-Unknown

Where do I stand regarding limiting screen time for kids?

Noncompliance with the guidelines was something that I myself was guilty of and the COVID situation definitely made it a lot worse – at least initially.

Undeniably, screen-time has a lot of educational worth. However, comparatively free play alone or with others offers much greater value for the child’s imagination and education.

The early years of a child’s life are so crucial and fragile. If we the parents don’t encourage compliance, then who will? That’s why I decided to make a conscious effort to do better.

The availability of screens is recent and quite intense. Undoubtedly, we need more research. I’ll be the first to admit that individual circumstances and outcomes will differ and there is no recipe or formula for raising a child.

However, the most pressing question for me is, where are we headed if we continue down the path we are already on?

Yes, we all deserve the little peace we get while our children are distracted on their tablets. But, how often does this happen? Is this sporadic or habitual? What are the consequences of the habits that we are creating?

There are numerous unanswered questions. However, what we do know is that they will continue to create more attractive, easily accessible gadgets and apps.

It’s already quite easy for even adults to become consumed and even obsessed with our screens. That’s why we should err on the side of caution, especially when it pertains to our children.

Belonging to a minority group or having a lower socioeconomic status already has numerous seemingly unsurmountable challenges, let’s not make screen-time become another one of them.

The dangers of screen time

Many scholars argue that unregulated screen time may lead to the emergence of new psychiatric disorders.

Young teenagers and even children as young as 8 years old are using social media such as Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and Snapchat.

Spending excessive time on digital devices can damage children’s eyesight.

Notably, the prolonged exposure to light from back-lit screens tricks the brain into thinking that it is daytime.

This signals the body to decrease or stop production of melatonin, a hormone responsible for regulating sleep patterns.

This is why bedtime becomes hard for children with iPads in their rooms.

Notably, more recent research has shown that exposure to blue light emitted by electronic devices does not cause blindness or macular degeneration (Ramsey, 2019). However, it does cause eye strain and dryness.

Also, playing games on smartphones or tablets increases stress levels in kids. The behavior of children remains affected when they are exposed to stress, which causes them to get agitated or angry during playtime.

Children with high stress levels were more likely to eat junk food and suffer from obesity. Thus, playing games can also affect their fitness levels.

Here are some of the potential advantages and disadvantages of screen time.

Advantages of screen timeDisadvantages of screen time
Boosts learningDecreases physical activity
Is fun and entertainingIncreases risk of obesity
Improves socialization
Reduces sleep quality
Develops finger sensory skillsDecreases emotional and cognitive development
Enhances emotional developmentCauses repetitive stress injuries
Boosts cognitive developmentReduces life satisfaction
Improves typing and research skillsIncreases bullying, addiction and cyberbullying
Causes digital eye strain resulting in headaches, blurred vision

At the very least parents should keep a watch out for the following:

  • Changes in social skills
  • Cyberbullying
  • Internet predators
  • Internet addiction
  • Eyesight deterioration due to prolonged screen time
  • Obesity and associated problems like diabetes, high blood pressure, etc.

Solutions to  control screen-time for kids

As parents, we don’t need more guilt or shame but unbiased educated solutions to do better, even if change is not always easy. Here are my top tips:

(1) Know your current situation. That is, what is your child’s daily screen time right now?

(2) Get a plan to control screen time.

(3) Understand why you choose to control your kid’s screen time. 

(4) Build healthy habits to keep your children occupied.

(5) Remember that being bored is okay. 

(6) Be an example by controlling your own screen time. 

(7) Reward them for controlling their screen time. 

(8) Spend more time with your children. 

(9) Figure out if there is a bigger issue at hand. For instance, is it just the screening time or your parenting methods in general?

 (1) How long is your kid’s screen-time

To control your kid’s screen time, it’s important to be cognizant of the influence the screen may have on your children, including subtle behavioral, social and language changes. 

Be aware of the types of programs, games, and apps that they use.

Notably, we often underestimate the total amount of screen-time. So, the issue may be much worse than you anticipate.

That’s why using an app may better help you know your current situation and track your progress. This is particularly useful if you decide to make a gradual instead of drastic change.

One research showed that the use of electronic monitoring such as ‘TV Allowance’ and ‘Mindmaster,’ although not desired by nearly half of the participants, caused a significant reduction in screen usage (Schmidt et al., 2012).

Screen time and children: guidelines, management and parental control.
"Kids have so much screen time, and it's a concern. I know how overloaded I can fell sometimes."-Suzanne Collins

(2) Get a plan to control screen time for kids

To control your kid’s screen time, have a plan and establish specific limits and guidelines for your own family. Think about how mature your child is.

Consider their individual need for certain types of personal devices and applications. Routines are great particularly for younger children.

As such, you can try scheduling their screen time in advance. Think of ways to minimize snacking. In addition, have screen free occasions and zones. 

Consider getting rid of some subscriptions/gadgets. Prioritize active routines and try to make the screen time as interactive as possible.

(3) Know the purpose for controlling screen time for kids

Ensure that the limited screen time that your kids do have is as productive as possible. It should help to improve the child’s education, creativity, communication, and connection.

In some instances, being too strict may cause a rebellious attitude and can affect your child from learning to self-regulate. So, remember that it’s okay to be flexible at times.

(4) Keep building healthy habits to control screen time

Do not give in to the tantrums and outbursts. But, help your children find new passions and interests that will entertain and engage them. Have active discussions so that they too can understand the value and risks of technology. 

Teach them about unsafe practices, cyberbullying, advertising messages and sexual predators. Help them to understand the importance of your limitations.

Also, make them realize that they may be missing out on so much more when they are stuck to their screens.

As your child gets older, it’ll be even more challenging to monitor them so it’s important that you let them understand your objectives.

According to research, parents often never remove a TV from a child’s room once it’s placed there. This practice associates with a much greater use overtime (Schmidt et al. 2012).

Read also: Why are habits more important than motivation?

pexels julia m cameron 4144038 scaled
"The human spirit must prevail over technology."-Albert Einstein

(5) Boredom is quite okay

If your children are anything like mine, they may protest of boredom when you take that TV or tablet away.

However, you can reassure them that it’s quite okay to be bored. If fact, that very boredom will likely increase their creativity, imagination, curiosity, and problem-solving skills.

(6) Reward them for controlling their screen time

Parents can give rewards to their children for not using digital devices or staying active outdoors to help control their kid’s screen time.

This will encourage them to take part in physical activities instead of spending all day in front of the TV.

Read also: Discover the pros and cons of health incentives

(7) Be an example by controlling your own screen-time

To control their kid’s screen time, parents should set a good example for their children.

Children imitate what they see. For example, if you are using your smartphone 24/7 and suddenly expect your child to cut down on screen time, he will find it difficult to do so because he has seen you spending so much time on it!

Thus, parents should first use self-regulation and reduce their screen time. Once they have set a good example for their kids, it’s easier to teach them how to control digital consumption as well as encourage them to follow the rules.

Research done by Lauricella et al., 2015 showed that the most significant predictor of children’s screen-time is the parent’s screen-time. Lower cognitive stimulation at home positively associates with screen media use.

Thus, awareness of your parenting styles, attitudes and practices are critical indicators of future outcome.

Children develop many habits from their parents. Therefore, be a positive example by establishing boundaries for yourself as well.  So, try limiting your own screen, especially during family time.

Is your own screen time affecting your health, parenting, or social interaction?

Read also: Unlocking behavioral change with the transtheoretical approach

(8) Spend time with them

Life is so busy, and most parents often work long hours. Unfortunately, some parents are often too drained for any further interaction, even with their own children.

Remember, regardless of your circumstances, your children deserve the best.

Nothing will ever replace the immense value of interpersonal relationships. They may even find you more exciting that the screen- well at least when their young. You do need to be honest with yourself and realize when you’re making excuses or taking the easy way out.

pexels helena lopes 4453089
"Technology is a useful servant but a dangerous master."-Christian Lous Lange

(9) Is it the screen or my parenting methods?

Sometimes you may just want a little quiet time and decide to use the screen as a babysitter. However, you do need to introspect to determine IF and WHY you’re letting things get out of control. Moderation is key!

Do you find it hard to say no and set limits?

Is it that you’re tired or just not interested in engaging more with the child? The first step to solving a problem is admitting that you have one.

If you’re struggling, get the help you need before things get out of control. Remember, prevention is always better than cure!

Final words on controlling your kid’s screen-time

There are many pros and cons of controlling your kid’s screen time, but the most important thing is that you do what’s best for your family.

After all, every child is unique—and so are their needs. What has been your experience? Have you tried any of these tips to limit your kid’s screen-time before?

Also, don’t forget to check out my top 10 strategies to help you better adjust to parenthood.

What are your views on screen time? Let me know in the comments below.pexels jessica lewis 4200824 Remember to share this so that other parents can join in the debate!

Recommended product to boost your child’s ability to resist impulses and control their emotions

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